CONPLAN 8888

CONPLAN 8888 (or CONOP 8888) also known as Counter-Zombie Dominance is a U.S. Department of Defense Strategic Command CONOP document that describes a plan for defending against any zombies. The April 30, 2011 document depicts fictional scenarios of zombie attacks for training students in military planning

The document addresses Pathogenic Zombies, the infected kind. It also names Radiation Zombies, Evil Magic Zombies, Space Zombies, Weaponized Zombies, Symbiant-Induced Zombies, Chicken Zombies, and the most common form seen in California, Vegetarian Zombies. Don’t forget about the Chicken Zombies (CZ). CZs occur when poultry farmers using carbon monoxide incorrectly euthanize old hens that can no longer lay eggs.

The hens are then deposited in large piles to decompose. The hens appear dead when buried, but inexplicably come back to life and dig themselves out from the piles of dead chickens. After reaching the surface, CZs stagger about for a period of time before ultimately expiring due to internal organ failure

A wide variety of different zombies, each brandishing their own lethal threats, are possible to confront and should be planned for, according to the document. Zombie life forms “created via some form of occult experimentation in what might otherwise be referred to as ‘evil magic,’ to vegetarian zombies that pose no threat to humans due to their exclusive consumption of vegetation, to zombie life forms created after an organism is infected with a high dose of radiation are among the invaders the document outlines.”

Rules of engagement with the zombies are clearly spelled out within the document. “The only assumed way to effectively cause causalities to the zombie ranks by tactical force is the concentration of all firepower to the head, specifically the brain,” the plan reads.

“The only way to ensure a zombie is ‘dead’ is to burn the zombie corpse.” There are even contingency plans for how to deal with hospitals and other medical facilities infiltrated by zombies, and the possible deployment of remote-controlled robots to man critical infrastructure points such as power stations if the zombie threat becomes too much.

This isn’t the first time zombies have been used to inspire trainers or the American public. The Centers for Disease Control (CDC) built an entire public awareness campaign for emergency preparedness around zombies. “Get a kit, make a plan, be prepared,” one CDC poster warns as a dead-eyed woman peeks over a blanket.