Funny Newspaper Headlines

Seems logical

Poking fun at the press is actually a lot of fun so here goes. I found these on the Web but they were all actually printed in a newspaper somewhere, sometime.

These are actual headlines from newspapers – Funny!

Most Earthquake Damage is Caused by ShakingReally?
Federal Agents Raid Gun Shop, Find WeaponsHmmmm
State Prisons to Replace Easy-Opening LocksGood move
Chick Accuses Some of Her Male Colleagues of SexismHer name was Laura Chick
Marijuana Issue Sent to a Joint CommitteeWho else could handle it?
Diana Was Still Alive Hours Before She DiedI’d hope!
City Unsure Why Sewer SmellsI could probably tell them
Bridges Help People Cross RiversSomeone should have thought of this sooner!=[
Homicide Victims Rarely Talk to PoliceRarely?
Mayor Parris to Homeless: Go HomeHmmmmm
Forecasters Call For Weather on MondayOK
Amphibious Pitcher Makes DebutAmbidextrous maybe?
Miracle Cure Kills Fifth PatientConfusing

Rio Grande Sun – Espanola, New Mexico · Thursday, October 12, 2000

State Population to Double by 2040; Babies to BlameWhat are these babies up to?
Breathing Oxygen Linked to Staying AliveThe Bee Gees Song?
Thursday is CancelledGood, I’ll just sleep in
Police Arrest Everyone on February 22ndHope they have a big jail
Safety Meeting Ends in AccidentSounds dangerous
Muddy Creek Problem: It’s Too MuddyThen it is named correctly
Murderer Says Detective Ruined His ReputationColumbo?
Utah Poison Control Center Reminds Everyone Not to Take PoisonGood Start
Students Cook & Serve GrandparentsCannibalism?
Alton Attorney Accidently Sues HimselfDid he win?
“Goat Accused of Robbery”Put him away!
‘We Hate Math,’ say 4 in 10 – A Majority of AmericansOk
Man Kills Himself and Runs Away!Wow!
A Nuclear Explosion Could Be a DisasterPossibly
Man Arrested for EverythingBook ’em Dano
Rooms With Broken Air Conditioners are HotWeird

The Chapel Hill News – Chapel Hill, North Carolina · Friday, July 26, 1985

The Sacramento Bee – Sacramento, California · Tuesday, June 23, 2015

The Windsor Star – Windsor, Ontario, Canada · Friday, August 21, 1998

Further Reading


Bored Panda

Author: Doyle

I was born in Atlanta, moved to Alpharetta at 4, lived there for 53 years and moved to Decatur in 2016. I've worked at such places as Richway, North Fulton Medical Center, Management Science America (Computer Tech/Project Manager) and Stacy's Compounding Pharmacy (Pharmacy Tech).

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